Realizations
by StoryDiva
Summary: Set after the last episode. Possibly spoilerish. Nathan visits Haley after the game.


Title: Realizations  
  
Author: Storydivagirl@hotmail.com  
  
Rating: G  
  
Spoilers: Possible-based off this last episode.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Nathan and Haley nor am I in anyway affiliated with the show One Tree Hill. This is all for fun because I like them.  
  
Archive: Sure, just ask first.  
  
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"I was worried about you," she states without preamble. She wonders if this is something she should work on, something you're not supposed to do with your whatever-Nathan-was. This thought quickly fades though when she gets a good look at him. He looks positively miserable, so sad, so lost. And he's here. That has to mean something, right? She steps closer to him, slowly, cautiously, like she's approaching a frightened animal at the zoo that could attack at any second. She asks, "Should you be here?"  
  
"Do you want me to leave?" he questions.  
  
"No, it's not-I don't want you fainting on me," she responds, motioning for him to come completely in the room. She smiles at him and says, "It could create problems for me at school, you know. If word got out that I killed the captain of the undefeated basketball team-well, I could be strung up."  
  
He smiles slightly and sits down on the bed. He reaches for her hand. It's one of those things he does that makes her heart swell and she thinks, she knows, it's because of how their hands fit together. She's never really held hands with a guy before, except maybe Lucas when they were little and Karen told them to hold hands while crossing the street, so she has nothing to compare it to, but this feels right. Nathan's hands are cold and rough as his thumbs rub over her skin. It's an odd fit.  
  
It's probably metaphoric of their entire relationship. An odd fit. No one could've guessed that the nerdy tutor and the Jock God of the school would end up together, especially Haley. Sometimes she's still not sure she believes it, convinced that there is some sort of cosmic joke going on, but then there are times like this with Nathan and it makes perfect sense.  
  
There's something about Nathan. Something untouched by all the glory, popularity, and drilling by his dad. There is something there and that's something Haley has realized isn't always the case with everyone. Some people are born bland, soulless, destined for a half-life and she knows that doesn't apply to Nathan Scott, even if he doesn't always believe it. Lucas has it too. Maybe it's something that comes about when you're dad is a jerk-like the kids of alcoholics who never touch a drop-or maybe it's a genetic thing that skips generations.  
  
Lucas would murder her in her sleep if he ever found out that Haley was comparing him to Nathan. There is so much anger there, on both sides, and sometimes she wishes she could bang their heads together and force them to see each other the way she does. Lucas might actually like Nathan. Lucas might see that that they really are alike, but Nathan is simply better at hiding it than Lucas. Nathan grew up differently, trained not to let people really see him, always too worried about what everyone would think of him if he wasn't perfect. It's sad actually-the idea that the only way to keep your father's love is to be the best all the time.  
  
There are times Haley wants nothing more than to reach out and hug Nathan, pulling him closer and closer and promising, "You're fine. You're so much better than all of this."  
  
Instead she remains silent, lending her support and an ear whenever he feels the urge to unload. She smiles at him and pats his cheek, allowing her eyes to say what words can't accurately describe. This is why she finds herself forgiving Nathan all the time.because he needs her. Because he tells her that he wants her and the way he looks at her, the way he acts when they're alone, makes her believe it.  
  
She can't imagine a time when didn't feel this way about him. It's odd to her, like it was someone else that hated (his word choice-she prefers "disliked with a fiery passion) Nathan for all that time. He asks to stay the night and she thinks about it for a second. The logical part of her brain hollers out. Responsible Haley should call his mother so she knows he's okay. Practical Haley knows that people will talk if they find out Nathan spent the night in her bedroom, no one will believe it was harmless.  
  
Haley's not going to listen to those voices. She's going on gut instinct and its screaming that Nathan needs her. Not basketball. Not Peyton. Not his stupid popularity aura. He needs her. So he can stay the night. She knows nothing physical will happen. He's dehydrated for god's sake and she's not that gullible. But she's pretty sure that being this close to Nathan, holding him, whispering that "everything is gonna be okay" will destroy what little resolve she has left. That vigilant wall she creates will crumble away and she'll be totally enamored with him. Not just like anymore.love.  
  
She simply shuts the door. 


End file.
